Archive for August, 2012

Texts Msns from Shayne

August 31, 2012

Shockingly that’s 2:40am, not pm


Photo Business Recap

August 31, 2012

Now that the market season is done, I want to do a recap of my first foray into self-employment/photos-for-money. I’m tired, but I really feel like putting this up now, so let’s just have a random list of stuff I learned in no real order, shall we? Correct grammar/spelling will be optional in this post, methinks.

I was going to end with a “last but not least/most importantly” thing about (in a trying-not-to-be-too-sappy way) how awesome everyone has been the past few months. From the constant “you can do it!” (or at least a timely “man up, asshole”) motivation to the even contstant-er help requests (“BUD – I NEED A BUSINESS CARD PDF NOW OMG!” or “Kat, I need you to finish my ‘I’m-doing-it-all-myself’ website!”), you’ve all been beyond amazing and I owe you all massively. I may not have the massive-est circle of friends, but this whole experience has emphasized “quality over quantity”. Hopefully that didn’t make everyone throw up too much.

On to my ruminations…

  • Businesses are expensive. The amount of times I ended up thinking “crap, I need ___, too” was impressive
  • A vehicle would be nice sometimes
  • Nine hours of work (I left to get the truck/equipment from work at 2pm and generally got home about 11pm after unloading) for $150 minus expenses is rough
  • Nine hours of work for $23 minus expenses is painful
  • There are no price signs big/neon enough to avoid “how much?” questions
  • Photos in Victoria =/= photos of Victoria
  • People love ducks looking cute
  • People love this squirrel (which I almost didn’t get printed)
  • There’s no possible “right” price for things
  • I need to get everything together the night before the market, not the day of
  • There’s no possible “right” setup for a photo tent
  • Wind sucks
  • I’m going to look like quite the drug dealer bringing all my cash to the bank
  • When you sweat while walking on a 10 degree day, you’re gonna have a bad time setting up a tent/booth when it’s 28 degrees out
  • Mini donuts > sales
  • Bird shit on tent > bird shit on photos
  • Total number of market nights I didn’t at least minorly injure myself from those wall racks: 0
  • Total number of photos sold from those wall racks: 0
  • Just realized I’m 0-for-2 in “professions that pay well”. Next year I’ll work on adding a fast food job for the trifecta
  • This was far more work than someone with my level of laziness should be committing to
  • Finally, a thought process I had during one of the early markets
    • So many impressive shots…
    • “Awww! Lookit the duckies!”
    • …that took creativity…
    • “Aww those are so cute!”
    • …and dedication…
    • “Soooo cuuuuute!”
    • …and dare I say a bit of skill…
    • “Wookit the widdle duckies!”
    • …and I could’ve simply dedicated my photography to shots of baby ******* ducks…
    • …wait a minute…
    • …Baby ducks are the Nickelback of photography.

A ONE gig card?

August 17, 2012

I wanted to get a photo off my camera, so after pulling the 16gb card from my computer’s slot, I popped open the camera to get the one from it.

Out popped a measly 1gb card. I just stared at it blankly, then started laughing because this photo immediately came to mind:

Me ‘n’ Diddy are a lot alike, apparently.


PS: I couldn’t remember which rapper it was in the pic, so I GIS’d “jay-z one dollar bill” and “kanye west one dollar bill” before finding out it was P. Diddy. To my amusement, both of those other searches also yielded this photo ūüôā

Fatman Rises

August 2, 2012

3:45 AM – Tyson is awoken by a fluttering sound around his window. Thinks nothing of it. Thinks I didn’t leave a fan on. Something touches his face. Tyson was asleep in his bed. Nothing touches his face there. Tyson turns on light.

3:46AM – Tyson is dive bombed by a mysterious flying creature. It is circling his room. Tyson is certainly doomed.

3:47AM РAfter several attempts of trying to hit flying creature with a pillow, Tyson stealthy exits bedroom for bigger weapon. Tyson has now established there is a bat in his house.

3:48AM – Tyson swats at bat with broom, and turns on ceiling fan.

3:49AM – Tyson swats at bat.

3:50AM – Tyson succesfully knocks bat out of the air. He throws a towel over the bat, and rushes it outside.

3:52AM – Bat flies away. Stunned, but unharmed.

3:53AM – Tyson utters a loud “fuck” when he realizes he should have taken pictures instead of going into Fight or Flight mode. Although there was no camera in his bedroom.

4:01AM РTyson writes on BFC.

As a kid I wanted to be Batman, but this is a little¬†ridiculous. Yes, I’ve¬†referred¬†to my place as the Batcave, but that had to do more with it being cave like, and in a basement. ¬†Bats are the worst alarm clock ever.